lies seem to be my oldest friends

if i stare back
through a window
through the din of
the sighs
and the multiple lies
playing each other
cheating
one by one

if i stare back past
the scars
what would i see?
would i see the reason?
if the tears were just words
would emotions run free?
would the reasons for lying
be spoken
or hidden?

if i told
would they believe?

a lie must be told
for the truth to come out
if you can't feel the pain
then you're lost
misplaced
and then there really is no reason to
come back
at all.

the past

never refuse
for the price
of death is too high
old scars
can fade
old lies can break out above the
surface
but what does it matter
if
there are new thoughts
and new words
new promises laid on top of the old ones
guaranteed to be broken
at one point or another
new
afresh
something different
the past
the scars
the tears
can be
forgotten
thrown away
against time
there is no better enemy
than
memory

never changing

the door is locked
a sliver of fluorescent
chilly glances penetrate through walls
furvent sighs
forgotten

she is frozen in
one world
never changing
letting the hours flout by
and drift away
empty eyes
without a memory

an echo ricochets beyond the hallways
but she is silent
letting the harsh light
embrace her body
rigid
in a hospital bed
never changing.

piece of sun

a streak of sunshine

falls from the clouds

above

they're dark

everything is

dark

except that streak of sunshine

that fell

through everything

a tiny light

inside me

it shines through my eyes

and sometimes

you can see it

concentrate

on that piece of

sun

that fell

just

for

me

lost memories

she's forgotten how to smile
how to laugh
her eyes have lost their
shine
she's feeling numb
emptiness surrounds her
nothing left for her
but she
just
can't let go of
the world
her memories
of him
of her former friends
who
used to make her happy
but all thats left of them is
memories

one more won't hurt

slip
one pill
won't hurt
the need
the thirst for more
the thrill of maybe
not waking up
to see the
morning sky
sun shining
against the pale
empty world
a distraction
no more thoughts
glassy eyes
forget and just
drift away
into nothing
a state of being
where
the barrier that
hides your mind
is down
and where you're slowly
dying

cement

cold
a breath
eases into the air
sharp
glistening rain
falls onto the
shiny black
cement
eyes reflect the light
shining from the stars
far above
and a wish to remain
in that
perfect picture -
forever

hidden thoughts

obsessions fail
your thoughts betray your
true intentions
they're hidden
i can see your hand
holding your pencil
without a care
velvet hours
ticking by
dreams undisturbed
thoughts
straying
swaying
to
him

the hour

a perfect hour
my eyes travel across the field
clumps of grass and dirt bright
against the sun's light
twirling
never ending
a glow traveling across your face
a pure smile
reaching me over the warm air
wind ruffles my hair
with the world spinning under us
perfection encased in an hour
a happy memory
promised to never
be
forgotten